Saturday, September 7, 2013

A QUILTERS LAST WILL AND TESTMENT

I'm sure some of you have seen this before but it's good for a little chuckle even if you have.  I'm printing one and hanging it in my sewing room - just in case.

The Quilter's Last Will And Testament*


I,___________________________,being of sound mind (a statement which does not bear close examination) do hereby record my last will and testament.

Knowing that __________________________________, my _________________ (husband, sister, or friend) hasn’t the least understanding or appreciation for, or for that matter, knowledge of my extensive fabric collection, which collection is suitably deposited in sundry places for safekeeping.

Knowing also that ___________________________ has already notified the local dumpster to pick up and dispose of the before mentioned collection "willy-nilly" (the thought of which causes me a most severe case of hives).

Therefore, I do will this collection and all other collections related to it, to my dear friend and fellow fabric preservationist, _________________________.

It is my wish that she/he, upon hearing of my death and obtaining clear proof that I did not manage, although goodness knows I tried, to take it with me, would come to my home post haste, before the dumpster, and search out my collection which is similarly stored at her own abode.

That she should rescue said collection and stack it in my quilting studio, along with my sewing machines, frames, old buttons, lace, patterns, quilts, dolls and works in progress.

After she/he has done this, she/he should purchase refreshments for my friends not yet departed, which friends are also her/his friends, and every last one shall be in that room and they shall hold a wake and say lovely and kind things about me until they run out and then they shall divide amongst themselves, by lot, my wonderful collection.

I shall be hovering over that very spot until this is done. _______________________ shall then quit this spot and close the door, leaving trivialities to those who do not understand. This is my wish on the matter.


Signed: ____________________ Date: ___________


Notarized: __________________ Date: ___________


*This is not a legal document

Written By Elinor Peace Baily,
Published in "The Cloth Doll"
Spring/Summer 1990
All kidding aside, recently a friend of mine, and fellow quilter, had an aunt (also a fellow quilter) who passed away.  During her last days, the aunt told my friend to please go clean out her sewing room and take anything she wanted, her machines, her stash, her rulers, her books and patterns, anything and everything she wanted.  My friend told her not to worry about her sewing room and that she didn't want to take anything as the aunt might get better and need it (knowing full well that that was not going to happen but wanting to give the Aunt hope).  After the Aunt's passing, the daughter, (not a fellow quilter or sewer) started randomly giving away "stuff" for her mother's sewing room.  She gave away fabric for UFO's but didn't give the already partially made blocks, etc and you can imagine what an even bigger mess she has created.  And you guessed it, none was offered to my friend!  How very sad for my friend!  She has spent the last 7-10 years toting her aunt around to shop hops, workshops, quilt shows and anywhere else related to quilting and is getting nothing offered to her!  Can you tell this upsets me?

It got me to thinking and I told my husband, "Do not even think about attempting to clean out my sewing room and studio on your own!  I have left instructions with my quilting friends and they will know exactly what to do!"  Lucky for me, I also have a daughter who isn't the quilter I am, but has made a few quilts in her very young age and at least has some knowledge about what a rotary cutter is and how to use it.  I sure hope they do the right thing when the time comes.  I'm confident they will.
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